Category Archives: Random

Product Review: Shea Moisture African Black Soap

Back in January, I purchased two new products from Shea Moisture’s African Black Soap line. I bought the body lotion and the body wash, they were on sale, buy 1 get 1 50%, on-line at I HAD to get both…I was forced. I’ve been on this natural kick since 2011 when I started transitioning my hair from relaxed to it’s natural state and natural/organic hair and body products are always on my radar. I’ve heard nothing but good things about african black soap, so I decided to give these two a whirl.


Item Description (from the SheaMoisture website)

SheaMoisture’s African Black Soap Body Wash cleanses, hydrates and calms problem skin. Helps to balance oily skin for a clearer appearance. – Made with natural and certified organic ingredients. – Oats help soothe irritated skin while absorbing excess oil. – Aloe moisturizes and calms dry sensitive skin. – Vitamin E is a powerful antioxidant highly effective in protecting skin from free radical damage.
I can’t speak for oily, problem, or sensitive skin, but this definitely hydrated and moisturized MY skin. Right after the wash, my skin felt really smooth and even once I was out of the shower and dried off, my skin still felt hydrated and soft. The body wash suds up a great deal, so a little definitely goes a long way. Although the body wash itself is black, it lathers up white. As far as the smell goes, it’s not strong or overbearing, it has a natural (surprise) sweet, earthy smell that is suitable for both men and women.

Item Description (from the SheaMositure website)

SheaMoisture’s African Black Soap Body Lotion hydrates, calms and heals problem skin. Helps to balance oily skin for a clearer appearance.

Before I say anything positive about this product, I’m going to mention the ONE flaw this product has in my opinion. The layout in which this container was designed creates a major defect with the consistency of this lotion. This lotion is more of a thick, dense cream, so for it to be packaged in an ordinary squeeze bottle, is a bit illogical. This lotion would do better in a tub with a twist off lid. To get all the contents of this lotion out, the top had to be cut off so the rest could be easily scooped out. Other than that, I have nothing but positive things to say about the lotion. In spite of the fact that this is more of a cream than a lotion, the final coating on  your body isn’t gooey or heavy at all. This product leaves your skin highly mositurized without feeling oily. Much like the body wash, the smell is pleasant and not very strong. Oh, and another thing, on the bottle it reads “For best results, apply to damp skin for moisture retention.” I would have to disagree on this one, I tried it on both damp and dry skin, and trying to rub this thick cream in on damp flesh, just didn’t work too well. I would advise drying off before applying this lotion.

Overall, I loved these two products! I’ll definitely continue to purchase the body wash, but until the lotion creates (if ever) a different packaging, I won’t buy it again. Too much effort for a lotion that I can find a cheaper dupe for…just being honest!

Have you out there tried either of these products? 

What were your thoughts? 

Products mentioned in this post were purchased using my own funds. Opinions are based on the characteristics of MY skin.

7 things I would rather do than clean my bathroom…

I’m assuming this prompt insinuates cleaning the bathroom is a retched, detestable chore, and there are minimally seven better yet putrid things one would rather do. Well, the one chore I don’t mind doing is cleaning the bathroom, so I’m going to twist this list around a bit. I’m going to do a list of 7 ghastly things and 7 satisfying things I would rather do than clean my bathroom.


  1. Read comments on the internet. This is including, but not limited to, Facebook and YouTube.
  2. Run. I don’t like running and my knees don’t like running.
  3. Clean out my inbox. There are two types of people. Those who have 1 or 2 unread e-mails and those who have THOUSANDS of unread e-mails. I’m the later.
  4. Do nothing. Absolutely nothing. To the point where I’m mind-numbingly (is that a word) bored.
  5. Re-organize Forever 21. Or Ross. Or Marshalls. You get it.
  6. Go to the DMV…said no one ever. Except me.
  7. Cut off all my hair. It’s hair. It would grow back. Not sure what I would look like while it grew back though.


  1. Spend time with Myles (my son). I mean, who wouldn’t?
  2. Go shopping. On-line and in person.
  3. Practice ASL and/or Spanish. I’m a language fanatic.
  4. Watch Netflix. With or without the chill, I’m not picky.
  5. Go on a date. Preferably with a beau.
  6. Sleep. You can never have enough sleep.
  7. Makeup. Anything to do with makeup. Apply it. Buy it. Watch tutorials.

What would you rather do than clean your bathroom?

Racism will NEVER die.

Let’s start off with this one point. Not one person in this world is/was born racist. Children do not see color. People are taught to be racist, and ignorance (which falls under the same category as racism) is tolerated, which leads to racism.

So of course I’m bringing up this topic because of the Michael Brown case. I’ll let you know how I feel. Do I think Michael Brown’s actions lead to his death? Yes. Do I think his death is justified? Absolutely NOT. Nobody knows the entire story, and unfortunately Michael Brown’s side of the story will never be told. The officer says “he reached for my gun”. How do we know that Michael Brown wasn’t trying to take the gun to throw it so the cop wouldn’t shoot him? Or how do we know that he reached for the gun at all? There is also the “brutal attack” the cop claimed and the busted eye socket that supposedly was done to him. I’m not sure if you’ve ever seen a broken eye socket, but the pictures of Officer Wilson did not show one.

I’m not here to say who was right or who was wrong, but I will say Michael Brown did NOT deserve to die. For the people claiming “he was a thug who we needed off the streets” you sir or ma’am are very ignorant and I will pray for you. Unless you knew him personally, there is no reason to call him any kind of name, or judge him because of the color of his skin. I’m not sure if anyone is aware of the definition of thug, but if not, a thug is a violent criminal; a brutal ruffian or assassin. To MY understanding, Michael Brown was none of these. People are bringing up the store incident, and once again to my understanding, the person on camera wasn’t Michael Brown. I watched an interview with the lawyer of the store clerk and at the time of the interview, the person in the video was NOT identified as Michael Brown. And if it WAS, those actions had nothing to do with the altercation with Officer Wilson. People act as if it is rare for teenagers to steal or get an attitude. I’m sure you’ve stolen something or know someone who has stolen something and they turned out just fine.

I’ll continue to use the Trayvon incident as a perfect example of why people still use the race card. When Trayvon Martin was murdered (yes murdered) people started calling him a thug and posting pictures of him smoking weed, with a grill in his mouth, and taking pictures while flipping off the camera. One, this hardly qualifies as being a “thug” and two, if you look on social media at any given time you will see all sorts of teenagers of different races, gender, ethnic backgrounds posting the SAME pictures. The media posted those pictures of Trayvon and then placed pictures of Justin Beiber and Miley Cyrus doing the EXACT same thing that lead to the labeling of Trayvon as a “thug”. Why is okay for them, but not him? That’s why the race card is still being pulled.


There is also a picture floating around of “Michael” with a stack of money in his mouth and him holding a gun. A lot of people have been reposting this picture saying “this is the thug we needed off the street” or something unnecessary. Fortunately, that picture wasn’t even of Michael Brown. So shame on those of you who posted things without doing your research.

What I’ve concluded is people only want to read, hear, and believe one side of the story. The minute they hear something the media posted (not anything they researched themselves) that backs up “their side” of the story, they’re quick to repost with an “I told you so”. The Internet has brought out the worst in people during this time and it has shown the true colors of how some people really think. For instance I’ve seen my fair share of non-black people posting pictures saying “we never riot like this when an officer kills a white teen” or “they wonder why their race is treated as such” but when black people come back with pictures of white people rioting because of a coach being fired, or a team winning/losing they become defensive and say “oh white people were just drunk celebrating” WHAAAAAT? Double standards. Not okay.

I know I’ve gone off on a tangent, but I want to give my final reasons on why racism will never die.

Segregation in certain areas still exists, and as soon as a colored person walks into a predominantly white neighborhood, people become scared. Why can’t that non-white person just be there visiting a friend? Or just moved there because they got a new job?

Black people are still using it as a cop out. Sometimes it might be true, but don’t use it as a way to try and get out of a mistake YOU made. Don’t get an attitude with someone to try and prove a point. Just do what’s asked and be on your way. Let karma deal with that other person.

When black people are articulate and intelligent, it’s considered “acting white”. Why does there have to be a label on it? What does acting white mean? Being smart? So bring dumb is acting black? I’m confused.

I just watched a few of Chris Rock’s stand ups and he speaks nothing but the truth on racism in America. It’s all sad, but 100% true.

And for the people tired of racists, take a screen shot of their ignorant comments and send them to the “getting racists fired” blog. Make a difference. Don’t just watch ignorance take place. And with that said, always correct spelling and grammar. Maybe we can start an epidemic.


Everyone has a fear. If they say they’re not afraid of anything, they’re lying. Those people are afraid of…the truth. I’ll tell you some of my biggest fears.

Bridges. I. Hate. Bridges. As some of you might know, I walked across the Brooklyn Bridge when I went to New York, and I hated every moment of it. Another fear of mine are snakes. I’m not so much afraid of big snakes that are held captive, but I’m afraid of the tiny little snakes that slither extremely fast across the pavement when you least expect it! I have anxiety EVERY summer due to this. I think my number one biggest fear is dying alone. I don’t want to leave this planet knowing I couldn’t find someone (who isn’t my son) that could love me for me unconditionally and vice versa. Now I know there are some common fears that I don’t have and I want to talk about some of the most common fears out there.

1. Fear of flying – I don’t enjoy flying. I guess you can say I have a rational fear of it. It’s not so much the flying I have a problem with, it’s the chance of the plane propelling to the ground at 1 million miles an hour. I try to sleep on planes to avoid this thinking, but I hardly ever sleep on planes. I’ve heard that having alcohol in your system makes sleeping on planes a lot easier, and by heard I mean I know.

2. Fear of public speaking – Although I suffer from anxiety, I don’t have a problem speaking to a bunch of people…especially if it’s a topic I’m very knowledgable about.

3. Fear of heights – Nope. Not at all. As a cheerleader and a flyer there’s no way I can be afraid of heights. I think, the higher the better!

4. Fear of the dark – The dark isn’t that scary. What IS scary is hearing strange noises and people talking while you’re alone in the dark. That’s scary!

5. Fear of intimacy – I’m assuming this means getting too close to people and letting them invade your personal life. Eh, I think this is just a guy thing. Get over it.

6. Fear of death, dying – People are afraid of this mainly due to the unknown. As a believer I know what lies for me at the end. So I’m not afraid of death, I’m afraid of HOW I’m going to die…credits to Investigation Discovery.

7. Fear of failure – EVERYONE fails at something in their life. The trick is to learn from it and not to make the same mistake again. “Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead-end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.” – Denis Waitley

Check out this link for some powerful quotes on failure. It should change your perspective 🙂

8. Fear of rejection – I think this is along the lines of fear of failure. You’ll never know until you ask or try. I think it’s better to live your life thinking “oh well” than “what if”. WHAT IFS are the worst!

9. Fear of spiders – Spiders are the least scariest thing to me. Don’t get me wrong, they do catch me off guard every now and again, but once I see one, I think “oh, it’s just a spider” and then proceed to kill it.

10. Fear of committment – I actually know someone like this. Not a fear of a committed relationship, but fear of committment to any and everything else. I guess committment means “this is it, I’ve made my decision, and this is what I’ve chosen.” When you’re 100% sure about something, there shouldn’t be any fear involved. If you’re not 100% sure, find something or someone who won’t make you think of anything else.

As you can see, my top three biggest fears didn’t even crack the top 10 most common fears. Goes to show that I’m a one-of-a-kind.

What are some of YOUR biggest fears? E-mail me!


Unusual Names

A name. It’s a word that sets you apart from the rest of the world. It is a word by which you are addressed as and referred to. It’s a word that can make you or break you. It’s a word that can jump-start your career or set you up for failure. Your name is what you have to live with for the rest of your life (or until you can legally change it at 18). So as a person who tends to look toward the future, it baffles my mind why ANYONE would name their kid something that will make them suffer as they get older, and as a PARENT I feel like it’s borderline child abuse…no but really. Yes, creativity is amazing, I am prone and very fond of creativity, but there is a very fine line between creativity and cruelty.

There are some people who get defensive on this topic, but studies show that employers occasionally skip over resumes of which contain hard to pronounce names. I know your name doesn’t DEFINE who you are, but it sure does make a first impression. Even the slightest spelling change in a name can make a difference between the “interview” and “nah I’ll pass” pile. It is 2014 and people are as crazy as ever, lets look at some of the names parents are coming up with to try to make their child “unique”.

I’ll start with my own personal story. When I was about 8 months pregnant with my son, someone asked me what I was naming my son. I told her I was naming him “Myles”. She kind of shrugged it off and proceeded to tell  me that her daughter’s name was Creative…WITH A K! She had the biggest smile on her face like she just struck gold. She was so proud of herself for naming her daughter KREATIVE. Next.

Now on to celebrities. I don’t know why celebrities can get away with naming their kid objects and everyone thinking it’s okay…oh wait, they can and do get away with it. They better hope their kids have the same kind of talent as them, or they never go bankrupt, because if some of these kids have to live in the “real world” they’re going to be SOL.

Ving Rhames and Deborah Reed named their daughter Reignbeau. I guess the regular spelling of Rainbow was just not enough, so they had to add an ethnic twist to it. I wonder if Deborah goes by De-bore-ah.

John “Cougar” Mellencamp and Elaine Irwin named their son Speck Wildhorse Mellencamp. Look here Mr. Cougar. Just because you have the nickname Cougar doesn’t mean you have to take it out on your son. And where did they get “Speck” from? Do Wildhorses have specks on them? I’m so confused.

 Jason Lee and Beth Riesgraf named their son Pilot Inspektor Riesgraf Lee. This is just plain ol RUDE! First off what if he doesn’t ever become a pilot inspector? Secondly this poor child is going to spell the word inspector wrong for his entire life because his parents were so kewl they had to change the spelling of a normal word. I’m done.

Rob Morrow and Debbon Ayer named their daughter Tu Simone Ayer Morrow. Oh I get it…it’s a pun, like Tu Morrow. This is a knee slapper, how KREATIVE of Rob and Debbon. Smh.

Frank Zappa and Gail Sloatman named their children Moon Unit, Dweezil, Ahmet Emuukha Rodan, and Diva Thin Muffin Pigeen. Nope, not even gonna go there.

And those are only FIVE celebrity couples I named, we can’t forget about one of the originals…Gweneth naming her child Apple. *le sigh*

Let’s take it to the streets, I hate using this term, but let’s look at some of the “ghetto” names. Of course there’s your typical Shaniqua and Sha Naynay, but like I said before, people are getting real crazy!

I hope you have all heard the story about the poor little girl named La-a. Now most people would look at that name and think “La-ah” or “Lay” but nope. The hyphen is actually part of the name. Not Lahyphena but La DASH a. That’s right folks LA-DASH-A. Don’t forget to say the “dash” part, it’s a crucial part of the name. Now I recently heard of another one, not sure how true it is. But if it is…DAMN. 0nika. No, this isn’t a typo, and no my “O” isn’t shaped weird. It’s a Zero. The child’s name is ZERONIKA. Can we just take a moment and pray for these people.

I think I’m going to end there, because my blood is starting to boil.

E-mail me:


MY Social Anxiety

Dating; it’s fun isn’t it? NOT. It’s awkward, it’s nerve-racking, it’s embarrassing, it’s stressful, it’s all the negative you can think of. Well, at least it is for me. I don’t enjoy dating, and I think that’s why I’ve been single for 3 years. I’ve gone about dating a few different ways, and it all leads back to one thing, me being single.

Let’s define dating. According to Wikipedia, dating is a part of the human mating process whereby two people meet socially for companionship, beyond the level of friendship, or with the aim of each assessing the other’s suitability as a partner in an intimate relationship or marriage.  SO SCARY!

Taking things above a friendship level…I have friends, I’ve also been betrayed by friends, so the thought of taking on a new friend and another relationship where I could ultimately get hurt, no thank you! The friends that I do have are always telling me to take a chance, and just date, go see what’s out there, but my gut tells me otherwise. I also happen to read a lot of dating articles. “What type of guy do you like” or “Where will you meet your future husband” type articles and of course those go to my head (like most things).

The thought of dating and finding someone to spend the rest of my life with is definitely desirable, but I’m not sure if it’s possible for someone like me who has self-diagnosed social anxiety.

I found an article on 5 ways to overcome dating anxiety on the Huffington Post website, let’s see if it’s possible for me to overcome it!

1. Practice self-disclosures. This talks about how to tell people what you think, how you feel and letting them see what matters to you. I feel like I’m that way with EVERYONE! Step 1…check!

2. Reducing the threat of judgement from others — and yourself. The threat of negative evaluation from others–such as being negatively perceived by your date–is the root of social anxiety, and is exacerbated in a dating setting. Socially anxious people tend to have lower self-esteem and make automatic negative assumptions about themselves. People who suffer from social anxiety judge themselves harshly and they assume others do too. This makes them not want to share, be open or be vulnerable.  This is where I fail. Yes I’m outgoing and I tell people what I think and how I feel, but I don’t share the intimate details of my depression and anxiety. This is the part where I fail MISERABLY and this is the part where I think EVERYONE has an ulterior motive…Step 2…FAIL!

3. Acceptance. When a person feels good about who they are, their values and what they have to offer, and sees their own experience in a compassionate way, it bolsters them against judgment. By calming their harshest critic, their own inner judge, it opens the door to experiencing closer connections with others. I know this sounds pathetic, but given my work history, I don’t feel like people take what I have to offer seriously, so then that falls on my failing self-esteem. Yes, good things come to those who wait…but sheesh I’m an old woman! Step 3…FAIL!

4. Reframing catastrophic cognitions. Thoughts like, it’s the end of the world if I’m rejected, I’ll never find someone, or that was a complete disaster, are common in anxiety. Gently remind yourself that the anxiety is exaggerating these beliefs, and then list reasons that the thoughts are not fully accurate. These are common thoughts, yet I know they’re not true. I’m working on this, so I’ll give myself partial credit. Step 4…loading.

5. Mindfulness and emotional intelligence. Anxiety thrives by focusing on the future and the past, engendering worry about what will go wrong, how the future will play out or how past events have gone wrong. Mindfulness is a conscious effort to focus on the present moment, the here-and-now. I don’t dwell on the past, as much as I worry about the future. So I guess I get half credit for this, but isn’t that still an F? Step 5…pending.

So according to this post there are 5 things that I should be focusing on to alleviate my social slash dating anxiety:

1. Monitor and understand one’s own emotions, rather than push emotions away or ignore them.

2. Self-soothe and cope with emotions when they arise.

3. Harness emotions to problem-solve or to help improve the current situation.

4. Listen, tune into, and accurately perceive the feelings of your date.

5. Show empathy and create a connection through shared experiences with your date.

Someone help me!

Anxiety 2



Follow Up: 30 before 30

Hey guys! As promised, here is my full list of 30 things to do before I turn 30 🙂

1.  Visit Maryland Twisters (x)

2. Learn to crochet (x)

3. Get closer to God

4. Learn to love again

5. Read 30 books

6. Get a spike

7. Go on a date

8. Finish a scrapbook

9. Go to a cocktail party

10. Straighten my hair (x)

11. Find my favorite wine (x)

12. Be confident enough to speak Spanish to Spanish speakers

13. Perfect my make-up routine

14. Take a ballet class

15. Learn a salsa routine

16. Get my 5th tattoo

17. Go on a hot air balloon ride

18. Go on a cruise (x)

19. Buy a car

20. Pay off credit card

21. Acquire a new wardrobe

22. Buy a homeless person a meal (x)

23. Stay up for 24 hours (x)

24. Have a girls night out

25. Learn to drive a stick shift

26. Get an office job (x)

27. Join a meet up group

28. Be in a studio audience

29. Walk across a bridge (x)

30. Read a book in Spanish

So…this is my list! Only 52 days left! EEK!

E-mail me: